You say Arabs are kind to tourists out of a sense of fascination and unkind to one another, and yet you failed to answer my question about the kindness that I and others who are Jordanian and Arab have witnessed from other Jordanians and Arabs who are complete strangers. I walk into communities all the time as a complete stranger and have experienced countless displays of kindness and generosity, often from people who can ill afford it. This remains true even after the initial “fascination” wears off, if you want to assume that this is the reason for it to begin with.

If you are calling for free speech and freedom or expressions, you need to be able to see that this is often undermined or threatened by generalized blanket statements that attack entire groups and label them in a particular way due to their gender, ethnicity, race or religion. Why is it ok to say “Arabs are absolutely unable to have a proper debate without resorting to uncivilized discussions” when you would never dream of making the statement about blacks, whites Muslims, women, Christians, people with disabilities etc.?

Think about it and if all the Arabs you know fit into the generalized descriptions you make in your post, perhaps it’s time for you to step out of your comfort zone and meet other Arabs who don’t.

Mesh, I emailed you the reply ;) The George Carlin clips aer awesome!

Raghda, the best way to solve a problem is by admitting there is a problem.

كم يصعب علينا كعرب تطبيقها

الإختلاف في الرأي لا يفسد للود قضية.

فعليا، الإختلاف في الرأي عنا مش بس بفسد القضية، لأ وبلعن أبو اللي
نفضها، اصلن بتتنسى القضية بالاخر وبتطلع برة موضوع النقاش، وربك حميد
اذا ما قلبت *طوشه وبكسات وتكسير منخير.

i find it hard that we Arabs (lets say Jordanians and not all, most of us) can discuss or debate an issue in a logical way and respect each other points of view -and keep them to our selves- (and i honestly may act like that sometimes when i discuss two major issues i believe i have good-great knowledge about + analysis : Computer Tech and Politics) -it’s an absolutely big X on me i know (bad behavior) , and it has nothing to do with being civilized or not as it has something to do with :

1. the way we’ve been raised up, its the psychological environment we lived in that we used to (actually have to) listen, respect, believe and not to comment or discuss what the Old says and take it for granted without a logical reason.

no one is perfect (except god), no human is infallible, even some prophets and messengers who were infallible, made tiny mistakes, we’ve been taught at school the following in Islamic classes:

“الخليفة العظيم عمر بن الخطاب حين يقول عند توليه الخلافة : فان زغت فقوموني فيرد إعرابي قائلا والله نقومك بحد سيوفنا”

and Omar did nothing about him, he didn’t get upset ! he was glad actually.. though he wasn’t ruling only one country then, anyway..

we were not allowed to discuss stuff with the same teacher who said the above (at least for the sake of mind tickling and making sure of things), it was considered “3eeb” or “7aram” though we were kids, and we asked questions as kids are curious at that point of their age..

2. and we grew up, and went to universities, and (Oh God) discussing something with an old instructor or professor, i swear to god, the best most humble professor in my years of university that i could ask him anything (no matter sounds stupid or smart) without being shout at or picked up on was Russian, i would be unfair if i said non of the Arab were, they were few, but they were around our generation, while the Russian was not ( i miss you Dr. Dimitry)

this second point and the restricted freedom of speech and activities in university, home and work (along with Proffs, parents and bosses) completed the Oedipus (not to forget governmental papers transactions) resulting with the first point to the wrong behavior of not respecting each other’s point of view and final result would be when debating or discussing:

My point of view is the right one, yours is wrong and you are a dumb ass and don’t understand anything in this world, period. goto *
————–
sorry for taking Islam and Islamic culture as an example of democracy and freedom of speech, but as far as i know, this is the simplest example of it (am not talking about currently improper applied Islam), to me, even USA’s democracy has red lines. (talking about logical democracy, and nothing above the law)

Culture of Shame (ثقافة العيب) is a two bladed weapons, inherited from the religion in a wrong way that one of the blades are harming us, tweaking it logically will simply turn it back to its source IMHO.

though i disagree with him in some struff, but this man speaks sense

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jrBVabH6Xl4

http://www.livevideo.com/video/ChurchOfGeorgeCarlin/92C57237AD2D40CAB2241ACAEC94509E/george-carlin-life-is-worth-lo.aspx (last 3 minutes)

ExpatInSaudi, well, it’s quite bad all over, really. It is always sad to see how we shun self-expression.

Ola, you think? I wonder if there were ever any efforts in Jordan to censor TV coming in from abroad?

Yasmin, you cracked me up :)

Raghda, thanks for your comment. I appreciate the time you spent on writing it, as well as the fact that you shared it. While I understand how this post seems self-hating, it was not meant as such. I do believe that we are not very civilized, regardless of what my definition of civilization is and regardless of what is yours. As far as I’m concerned, it saddens me a lot that we keep drifting farther and farther away from an intellect that at some point shone in the world’s history. I did not mention what I believe is a more civilized example and what is not either, though I agree with you that the Google insert does make i seem like I am talking about the US, when I was not. I was also not referring to hospitality towards tourists, the hospitality there is arguably more about fascination, I was talking about being kind to each other.
I know that you are very active in the field of empowerment, and that you work in improving skills and curricula, so I am very happy to read your opinion. While it is often appropriate to take a more positive outlook on life, this is not one such case for myself.

I have an issue with the following statements and the premise behind them:
“I’m sure you cannot argue that we Arabs are absolutely unable to have a proper debate without resorting to uncivilized discussions, attitudes, and often fights”: This is a massive over generalization. It also reeks of condescension, and worse yet, feeds into everything you claim to not approve of. Respect for debate and the opinions of others means you have to be open to possibilities, differences and variations, and yet your statement is full of blanket, stereotyped generalizations.

Your use of the words “civilized” and “uncivilized” which you repeat several times, most strikingly in the statement: “make us less civilized, more angry, and probably scare away the civilized world” is astounding to me. Who decides who’s civilized and who’s not? You? Or is it the West which you seem to bestow the honor of “civilized” on (as represented by Google?) I can name a multitude of ways in which the West is anything but civilized but that will take more time and space than this comment allows.

Another incredible generalization is ”it is also a part of our culture to be very kind and hospitable to those we know and very rude and inhospitable to those we don’t”. I see your point with the driving and even the anonymous comments online, but do you really believe that Arabs are rude and inhospitable to people they don’t know? How do you explain the kindness and hospitality to tourists and visitors from people all over the Arab world to whom they are complete strangers? How do you explain the fact that, like many others, I have witnessed numerous acts of hospitality, warmth and kindness from complete strangers all over Jordan and the Arab world?

I won’t go on, but will end by saying that blanket generalizations cannot and will not get you very far in proving how outrageous the prospect of Internet censorship is, nor in proving anything else for that matter. Self-criticism and taking a long hard look at ourselves is a good thing, but when it ends up being a bashing senseless tirade, you achieve nothing.

I feel that the parliament, which consists mostly of people well over 40, feel threatened by the Internet for the same reason. It’s something new to them, something tey didn’t grow up with and is becoming increasingly popular, gaining momentum that’s working to change things on the ground of reality. What the heck, even the geekiest of all geeks may find it fascinaing how the effect on online campaigns actually had and continue to have a huge effect on real time issues. Maybe that’s it… Evil World Wide Web