Although yes, it is about Michael Phelps, I promise that this post is not sports related. Well, unless you consider eating gigantic amounts of food a sport. And it might as well be, because when you think about, to get to that stage where you can consume a whole lot of food without effort, you have to go through a very painful process.

Anyway. Back to Michael Phelps. His breakfast consists of 4,000 darn calories, twice what a normal guy should eat ALL DAY. Yeah, I understand that he must burn a lot of energy with all his fishy moves, but this is what that man eats for breakfast:

1) Three fried egg sandwiches with cheese, tomatoes, fried onions and mayo.
2) A five egg omelet
3) A bowl of grits
4) Three slices of French toast
5) Three pancakes with chocolate chips
6) Two cups of coffee

Total calories: 4,000 calories.

With such a diet, one would think that the entire secret to the 14 Olympic golds is all that fat. But is it?

We attempt to find out, with Moose happily volunteering to be our guinea pig.

We pick up the stuff, and get the menu ready for Moose to consume.

There’s enough food to feed a family of 10, and although it looks very good and smells even better, it’s still quite daunting. But Moose does not fret, and is ready to eat everything laid out across the table:

He starts with the three sandwiches.

Devours the omelet.

Moves on to the pancakes.

Eats the cereal (which we replaced the grits with, what the hell is grits anyway, they didn’t have grits in CTown)

Finishes off the french toast

And finishes the first part of the experiment successfully.

The second part though… with so much junk weighing him down, just getting to a swimming pool was nightmarish as a thought. It doesn’t matter though, because Moose insists that it’s all about the timing, and he bets anything that Michael Phelps doesn’t finish his breakfast in under half an hour, like Moose did. In fact, he challenges him for that…