AndFarAway

A Blog from Amman, Jordan, Online Since 2004.

Month: September 2008 (Page 1 of 3)

Beautiful Schism

Today is Eid beneath the gray skies of Jordan. The city is quiet at this time of the morning, but the weather seems to be angry again. In most of the countries we share a border with, like Lebanon, Palestine, Saudi Arabia, and umm, Sunni Iraq, who share our sky too, it’s Eid today as well. A few countries a bit farther away, although their sky is not attached directly to ours, it’s Eid too, and those countries are Kuwait, Qatar, the Emirates, Yemen, and Libya.

Yet, tomorrow is Eid in Syria, for although they’re only a couple of hours car trip from my couch right now, I guess God sent them a different moon. He also went ahead and sent that same moon of Syrias to Egypt, Turkey, Iran, Shiaa Iraq, Bahrain, Oman, Morocco, Tunisia, Algeria, Mauritania, Sudan, and Pakistan.

On the occasion of Ramadan ending under our sky, I’d like to share a little movie that my friend Ibra made about our schism as a culture, as an identity, as a nation:

Yesterday, we went out for ftoor, and in the car on the way, I looked at the nearest supermarket that sells alcohol, and they had the whole section of alcohol walled off neatly with white walls, keeping the “sin” away from the holy eyes of the month of Ramadan. When we went back home, less than two hours later, after Eid has been announced, the walls were gone, and the store looked like it did before.

The fifth year in business

R: Can you believe that place is going into its fifth year in business? Man, next September it’ll be five. DAMN. Five years is a lot of time. It’s almost a quarter of my life.

M
: Almost. But yeah, you’re right, it is a lot of time. Next year, on its fifth birthday, we’ll throw it the biggest party ever, complete with cake, candles, and tabbouleh.

R
: Yeah! That would be so much fun! And we can invite a hundred people, and choose music that it may like, and decorate the place with little red shoes! Oh, and confetti, and a lot of candy, and pizza-

M
: And Ferqet Sala7ef il Ninja.

R
: A clown! Oooooh, we can use the free Mubaweb ad that came with our Al-Ghad subscription… Hahaha, that would be awesome.

And this blog turned four early this month.

Healthy Choice with Chemicals

How anyone in the world would save a burger for over ten years defeats me, although I am a grade A hoarder. I stopped “saving” food in the 4th grade, when my grandmother gave me a very prettily wrapped Eid chocolate, and I put it away in my cashbox, only to find it bug-infected a year later. I did keep the wrapper though.

Anyway. This woman, who gives classes on good food, has a McDonald’s hamburger from 1996.

Burger1996

And it looks exactly the same as it did on the very day she bought it, 12 years ago.

And here’s a comparision between the 12 year old burger and a new one:

Burger2008

From her blog: “People always ask me – what did you do to preserve it? Nothing – it preserved itself. Ladies, Gentleman, and children alike – this is a chemical food. There is absolutely no nutrition here. I marvel at how McDonalds has infiltrated our entire world. A hamburger here tastes exactly the same in China or some around the world place. It’s cloned. Makes you wonder doesn’t it?”

Being the kind of person who doesn’t exactly care about nutrition, I must say I feel a lot more comfortable eating a McDonald’s burger now that I know that it’s that well preserved.

End of September Status Update

Do you believe that the world sends vibes, and that people’s moods influence one another?

A time to escape






People on the weather

People on rituals


Related:
September and the summer is over
The end of August
Weekend Update
Beginning of January
Feelings going around this February
April Sentiments
Status Update Special: Lubnan
June and things are getting brighter
Cause you know, there’s no one from home to support
August Status Update

Not ready yet

One day it was quiet, silent, still. The sleeveless shirts, skirts and sandals happy and excited.

Suddenly.

Picture 4

The coal, the jackets, the heavier blankets. THE RAIN.

And I’m not ready yet.

Stuff

As much as I hate pasting links, this stuff is really funny.

N.Y. man caught using mannequin to drive in carpool lane
Utah turns to Twitter to update residents on news, state events

Photoshop will eat your soul

Tarik: I spend so much time Photoshopping things that when I’m sitting with people, all I can do is stare at their faces and think about how I would fix them up with Photoshop. I really can’t help it. That nose needs a little flattening, those cheeks need to be higher, and the teeth need a bit whitening.
Then I go home and Photoshop a picture of you. I make people look good. I think I have Photoshopped every single person I know.

– Tarik, sounding more crazy than Andy Warhol.

Atlanta

Dubai is crazy. It really is. Just absolutely insane.

Quoting an article from the Daily Mail: “It’s the latest word in Gulf excess – a sprawling £800million resort boasting a £13,000-a-night suite and dolphins flown in from the South Pacific, all atop a palm tree-shaped island.”

Some images:

Atlantis hotel, Dubai

hotel dubai

Atlantis hotel, Dubai

Atlantis hotel, Dubai

Atlantis hotel, Dubai

Atlantis hotel, Dubai

Atlantis hotel, Dubai

What are they eating?

Yes, it’s the lamest ad you could ever see in your life. I know. Even lamer than Jerry Seinfeld’s stand-up comedies. But that really isn’t why I post it.

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING THEY’RE EATING?

They used to sell them at our school’s cafeteria. They weren’t very delicious, but they were available, and at school, anything edible is delicious. They tasted like Taco Bell desert.

But problem is, I forgot what they were called. And I’ve been trying to remember their name for years. At least once every couple of months. I google it, I ask people, but nothing. I just cannot remember.

And they are not pretzels. They’re sweet, cinammonish, and they used to rotate on sticks.

A Journal of Love & Hate

Two quick “site:andfaraway.net hate” “site:andfaraway.net love” google searches and I have pages and pages worth of personal opinions.

I love Swatch.

What I love about Pollock is how shocking his paintings are.

I love it so much I wish I can hug it and feel it oozing its bitsy bytsey…

I guess all I can say is that I love Radiohead.

But man, I love that stuff. It’s my answer to everything.

Which translate to, I love you Nokia!

I love you mommy, inti 7ayati.

I love the summer.

Hal, I love you ya benet.

I love being awake, thank you very much.

What I really love about Durra’s artwork is the fact that I feel like it’s …

Ferrero, I Love You.

And of course, for every expression of love, there’s an expression of hate:

I hate Batelco.

Reason 436 on why I hate Sweifeyeh

I also found out that I hate the “tourist Amman”.

I hate Manarat with all my heart and all my soul.

I’ve already ranted about how much I hate smilies– should I remind you?

I HATE heels, plus, I can’t drive in them.

I hate him! He’s so lame!

Who is familiar with the song “I hate you so much right now. AHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

I hate routine, really, I do.

I hate zoning.

I hate the daily traffic jam on the way out of University Street.

I hate Celine Dion.


And I’ll seal it off with:

I hate my absolute inability to feel indifference. Sometimes, the only thing I want is to just not give two shits.

But really. I can’t.

It’s just not my nature. I have to have an opinion about everything, from the annoying reddish-tint of those tissues to the shirt you are wearing. That’s just who I am. I notice these things. I care about what I notice. I am consciously thinking about everything I see, everything I hear, everything I read. Yeah, I do not always voice what I am thinking, because if I do I’d never shut up.

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