Death to the ugly yellow smileys!
The internet has more visual pollution than JU during Student Council elections, but as far as I’m concerned, the worst pollutant is the ugly yellow smiley face sprinkled all over the web!
Hell, whoever brought them hence forth out of the 70’s and into the new millennium needs to be tossed into a yellow cell for the rest of his life. THE REST OF HIS LIFE.
Why internet smileys should be boycotted:
1. They are too yellow. Yellow. YELLOW!
2. They’re too overenthusiastic.
3. They’re all cross eyed.
4. They are drawn by jerks who CAN’T DRAW!
5. They are over animated in a sense that I feel like whacking them on the face with my 800-paged Lord of the Rings hardcover book.
6. They negate a phrase’s meaning, turn it upside down, inside out, and leave the reader in semantic anarchy.
7. People use them instead of words, which are so much more interesting.
8. They are drawn by people with NO IMAGINATION!
9. Sometimes, they BLINK!!! Argh!
10. Their colors don’t match. At all.
Blood boiling first example, my brother’s contact list:
Teeth crunching second example:
Fist breaking third example:
Leave the smiley faces where they belong, in the 70’s!!!!!
And I won’t even start with the emoticons…
DEATH TO THE SMILEY FACES! DEATH TO THE SMILEY FACES! DEATH!