If I could be a bonnie pirate, I’d outlaw the creation of stories pertaining to the sea, islands, and ships unless they had to do with pirates, and I’d make sure they added “Arr!” to the dictionary. (this one is for Gus, Sami, Sarah, and Ammar)

If I could be a pariah, I’d finally be able to scream out all of what’s on my mind without worrying about being shot.

If I could be a bible archaeologist I’d set out to prove/disprove the links between the Bible, the Torah, Gilgamesh, and the Dead Sea scrolls.

If I could be an architect, I’d wipe Gardens Street off the map and rebuild in such a way that it stops being a stress inducing, unbearable stretch of horribly ugly signage and impracticality.

If I could be a linguist, I’d make Arabic a bit easier so that the idiots like me could have an easier time dealing with it.

Subzero Blue passed on this meme to me, and I will in turn pass this on to Lina, Linda, and Iyas.

Ok, here’s the list:

“What follows is a list of different occupations. The reader must select at least five of them. The reader may add more if they like to the list before they pass it on (after the reader selects five of the items as it was passed to the reader). Of the five selected, the reader is to finish each phrase with what he would do as a member of that profession. Then pass it on to three other bloggers.”

If [Reader] could be a scientist // If [Reader] could be a farmer
If [Reader] could be a musician // If [Reader] could be a doctor
If [Reader] could be a painter // If [Reader] could be a gardener
If [Reader] could be a missionary // If [Reader] could be a chef
If [Reader] could be an architect // If [Reader] could be a linguist
If [Reader] could be a psychologist // If [Reader] could be a librarian
If [Reader] could be an athlete // If [Reader] could be a lawyer
If [Reader] could be an innkeeper // If [Reader] could be a professor
If [Reader] could be a writer // If [Reader] could be a backup dancer
If [Reader] could be a llama-rider // If [Reader] could be a bonnie pirate
If [Reader] could be a midget stripper // If [Reader] could be a proctologist
If [Reader] could be a TV-Chat Show host // If [Reader] could be a pariah
If [Reader] could be an actor // If [Reader] could be a judge
If [Reader] could be a Jedi // If [Reader] could be a mob boss
If [Reader] could be a backup singer // If [Reader] could be a CEO
If [Reader] could be a movie reviewer // If [Reader] could be a monkey’s uncle
If [Reader] could be a bible archaeologist //If [Reader] could be a househusband
If [Reader] could be a lifeguard //If [Reader] could be a comic artist
If [Reader] could be a stockbroker//If [Reader] could be a travel writer
If [Reader] could be a food reviewer //If [Reader] could be a politician
If [Reader] could be a male underwear model //If [Reader] could be a fashion designer
If [Reader] could be an game designer // If [Reader] could be a dog-trainer
If [Reader] could be a Transformer // If [Reader] could be a computer virus
If [Reader] could be a porn star // If [Reader] could be another blogger
If [Reader] could be a grain of sand // If [Reader] could be a fly on a wall
If [Reader] could be a president // If [Reader] could be a rock star